DENTON
(lips fade into a picture of a cross) { "Crucify! Crucify!
Crucify!..." }
{ Push the steeple of the church up, "Ring the bell!"
"Knock on the door!" }
Dentonian Here they come! (Dentonians cheer and throw rice)
Photographer Let's get a picture. Close together now. The folks and then
the grandparents. Just of the close family. Ahhh, hold
that. Beautiful. And... (snap)
{ (evil laugh) "Now I've got your souls!" }
Dentonian Congratulations. { "Thank you" in a voice like the
dentonian }
Ralph I guest we finally did it, huh.
{ "Hit him!... Hit him back!" }
Brad I don't think there's any doubt about that. You and Betty
have been almost inseparable since you met in Dr. Scott's
Refresher class.
Ralph Well to tell you the truth, Brad, That's the only reason I
showed up in the first place. (chuckles)
Betty O.K. you guys, this is it. (everyone screams)
Ralph Well Betty's going to throw the bouquet. { throw BOUQUET }
{ "Do you have syph?" }
Janet I got it! I got it!
Ralph Hey big fella { "How would you know?" }, looks like it
could be your turn next, eh?
Brad Who knows.
{ "Hit the car twice if you're an asshole!" }
(Brad hits the car twice)
. . .
{ "Be just and fear not... Be stoned and fear nothing...
except old people..." (this has to be timed right, say
"old people" when it shows the old people) }
Janet Oh Brad, wasn't it wonderful? { "No!" }
Wasn't Betty radiantly beautiful? { "No!" }
I can't believe it. An hour ago she was just plain old
Betty Monroe, and now... { "now she's a slut" }
now she's Mrs. Ralph Hapshatt.
Brad Yes Janet, Ralph is a lucky guy. { "No he's not, she's got
syph" }
Janet Yes.
Dentonian I always cry at weddings.
{ "Show me an angel masturbating thank you." }
Brad Everyone knows that Betty is a wonderful little cook.
Janet Yes.
Brad Why Ralph himself, he'll be up for a promotion in a year or
two. { "If he doesn't get busted first" }
Janet Yes.
Brad Hey Janet.
Janet Yes Brad?
Brad I really love the { "Starts win an S...Sku...Sku...Sku..."
}
skillful way... { "what a fucking genius" }
you beat the other girls... { "with whips and chains?" }
to the bride's bouquet. { "that too..." }
Janet Oh Brad. { "Eat your veggies, bitch!" }
{ audience echoes 'Janet's, 'Oh Brad's, 'Dammit Janet's }
Brad The river was deep but I swam it (Chorus: Janet)
The future is ours so let's plan it. (Janet)
So please don't tell me to can it. (Janet)
I've one thing to say and that's Dammit, Janet I love you.
The road was long but I ran it (Janet) { echo "backwards"
}
There's a fire in my heart and you fan it (Janet)
If there's one fool for you then I am it. (Janet)
I've one thing to say and that's Dammit, Janet I love you.
Here's a ring to prove that I'm no joker. { echo "...that
I play poker." }
There's three ways that love can grow { "sex, drugs and
rock and roll" }
That's good, bad, or mediocre. { echo "That's straight,
gay, or bi-sexual!" }
{ "How do you spell slut?" } Oh J-A-N-E-T I love you so.
{ "Don't drop it!" }
{ "How was your orgasm?" }
Janet Oh, it's nicer than Betty Monroe had. (Oh Brad) { "Turn the
flowers" }
Now we're engaged and I'm so glad (Oh Brad)
That you met Mom and you know Dad. (Oh Brad)
{echo "That you fuck Mom and you blow Dad." }
I've one thing to say and that's Brad, I'm mad, for you
too.
{ echo "For a screw" over "for you too" }
Oh Brad...
{ "Sluts strut" "assholes shuffle" }
Brad Oh... dammit. { echo "Oh... shit }
Janet I'm mad... { echo "I'm pregnant" }
Brad Oh... Janet. { echo "Oh... shit" }
Janet ...for you.
Brad I love you too. { echo "I love to screw-ew-ew-ew." }
Brad & Janet There's one thing left to do - ah - oo. { echo "ah-choo" }
Brad And that's go see the man who began it. (Janet) { "He's in
the box!" }
When we met in his science exam-it (Janet) { "What the
fuck is an examit?" }
Made me give you the eye and then panic (Janet)
{ echo "Made me piss in my pants and then panic" }
Now I've one thing to say and that's Dammit, Janet, I love
you.
Dammit, Janet.
Janet Oh Brad, I'm mad. { echo "you fag" over "I'm mad" }
Brad Dammit, Janet.
Brad & Janet I love you. { echo "I love screw" }
{ at the picture of the cross "Symbolism" }
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